Target/Implied Target Question

[Komie]

I have a quick question. Here's a screen shot to look at to understand what I'm talking about...

http://img836.imageshack.us/img836/9004/eq2000013c.jpg

First, is there anyways to disable the AFK, LFG, LFW clickable area on my unit frame?

Second, why does the third unit frame (the one on the right) look different compared to the other two? Is there anyway to get it looking like the other two? Or get the other two looking like the third one?

Third, is there anyway to make the first and second unit frame any bigger? They're to small for me.